You have no idea how bad I want to be with you right now. How bad I want to hear you tell me the three words that you love me. How bad I just want to talk to you and hear your voice. Or how bad I want to feel your arms around me giving me your perfect hugs. How bad I just want to hold your hand and look into your eyes and know that everything is going to be okay. I miss you and I cant imagine life without you. But most of all I Love You. You are my best friend and I want to do everything with you, I want to go on adventures together, stay up late watching our favorite movies, laugh until our stomachs ache, bake cookies and your favorite brownies together, cook a fancy dinner with you and bee so proud of ourselves that we were able to do it. A day or even an hour doesn't go by without me thinking about you. As I'm writing this I keep thinking of all the fun things we had planned for this summer and even though you didn't think that I wanted to go to Moab or Havasupai or Hiking or anything like that, I did. I was so excited to go to all of those places with you and finally do things that you like to do and that make you happy. I was so excited for you to come with me and my family to Yellowstone, I wanted to go swimming with you. I wanted to do it all with you. I makes me sad to know that now I won't get to do those things with you by my side and with me by your side.
It kills me to know that you don't feel the same way about me, and that you probably don't think about me or even feel the same way as you once did. I don't know where to go from here, I don't know if you want to hear from me or see me again or maybe I should just stop bugging you and realize that I'm not the one you want? I honestly just don't know what you want. Just know that I love you. I won't ever stop loving you.
You probably won't even read this and I just basically poured out my heart for the world to read. But oh well cause I just needed to get it out there.
If you do read this just know that all I want is for you to be happy, and I clearly don't so I hope and I pray that someday you do find that girl that you want to spend everyday with and that makes you smile every time you even think about her. She will be one of the luckiest girls on this planet. I hope she knows that she is, and never takes it for granite.
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